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The various details of the scandal itself have been extensively reported, and I need not repeat them; the issue I want to discuss is: why is the wife so forgiving?

No doubt ambition is a factor: she would like the husband to make an effort to keep his job and is willing to stand by him while he makes the, unsuccessful as it turned out, try, but I believe the larger factor lies in women's attitude towards men, largely driven by their maternal instinct that, in more than one ways, lead to low expectations.

Women give birth to children, while men only makes a contribution of genes; this allows women to take credit for the fundamental effort in continuing the specis; they feel superior to men.

In most mn-woman relationships, women do most of the hard work, while the men, who might contribute more money than the women, do less work and more often then not are taken care of (mothered) by the women, including buttering up their egos: in most couple relationships, women do various things to make the men feel more important, more manly, while actually thinking that men are just little boys who cant take care of themselves, physically and emotionally.

Sounds cynical? Take a look at Hillary and Bill Clinton: is there any doubt that Hillary despises Bill, yet did her utmost to protect him? These are parts of the same thing: the view that men cannot handle themselves and need women to take care of them.

So when Silda Spitzer discovered (I assume she found out long ago) that he needed to go to prostitutes to satisfy his sexcual needs, besides feeling insulted that she was not enough to satisfy him, she would also have had a feeling of satisfaction too: of course men are like that - it confirmed her contempt for men, including him. It is only to be expected that he had to go to lower class women to satisfy his baser instincts. It does not conflict from the usefulness of men, for supplying women sperm that allow them to be mothers, and social positions as wives of leaders of some kind or other. Men are tolerated as useful objects, but dont expect too much of them.

a colleague mentioned something amusing: a japanese family lived in the apartment next to his, and every morning the wife comes out first, pressed the lift button for the husband, and when the elevator arrives, hands him his briefcase and bows as the door closes; sounds idyllic for the husband? I am not sure, for I also hear stories that in many japanese families, the wife asks for a divorce after the husband retires - she cannot stand having him home all the time - while he still has a job, she could get rid of him for the whole day, and sends him to work feeling important, an economic samuri for his company, his family, his country; after he goes for the day, she sends kids to school, meets her friends for lunch, does some work around the house, picks up the kids, prepares dinner, and waits for the husband to return to continue the effort of boltering his ego...

I am actually not looking down on all this; all part of life


I thought she looked old for her age (22); I think her harsh experience has aged her prematurely

However, now she can sell her story to tabloids, including british and other overseas outlets; also, her website shows some PR skills, so she should be able to write a book based on her experience, if necessary with the help of a ghostwriter sent by the publisher (most celebrity biographies had that kind of help).